We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
