I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
