question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
