How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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