Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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