Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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