Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Randomize
