party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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