i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
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Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
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