My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
