My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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