I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
