yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
