if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
