Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
