The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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