the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
