The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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