I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
