What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize