Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize