I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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