I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I have fence marks all over my body
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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