We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
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It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
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I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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