You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize