Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
