I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
