is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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