And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just gift wrapped bread.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
