All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize