using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
