you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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