He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I want her autograph on my taint
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
