I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
