so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
