I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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