And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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