so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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