I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
honey bunches of taint.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
