piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
This girl is more easily done than said...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
