she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
