He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
