Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
porn star boner night. come get it.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
