I want to have your abortion
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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