i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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