A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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