Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
