:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
we're making bets on your personal life
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
