Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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