Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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