I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
they're like a gay fantastic four
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
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