it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
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It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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